[ Akira's initial comment earns a slight arch of an eyebrow, though his smile is amused. ]

Only right, huh? That's quite the romantic notion.

[ And it's not like Akechi is entirely surprised-- Akira, especially as Joker, has shown himself to be fond of grand displays of affection-- but it does somewhat impress him, that Akira would stick up for this kind of selfish relationship. It vaguely makes Akechi wonder, how much he would compromise on his morals for the sake of love... ]

Ah, but I wouldn't be so quick to jump to conclusions. Do you know how the rest of that story goes?

[ Akechi gets the implication in Akira's tone and huffs a small laugh at it. Under normal circumstances, yes, burning down a house because of an accusation like that would be considered an extreme measure, but-- ]

She does, but it's only to prove a point: if the child wasn't Ninigi's, then it would surely perish in the fire. However, some time later, Sakuya-hime emerged from the flames with three children, none of which had been harmed whatsoever. It is said Japan's Imperial family descends from them.

[ Okay, so maybe it was still an extreme way to make a point, but... somehow, Akechi can't blame her for feeling angry. ]

Still, having her virtue under suspicion like that, with her own husband accusing her... That's love without trust. What's the point of that?

[ At the question, Akechi falls silent, his thoughts wandering off. Somewhere in his subconscious, he was undoubtedly drawing comparisons with their own relationship-- and unlike Sakuya-hime, he was hardly innocent. Akira, too, probably had secrets of his own, things he had been hiding ever since that time with the door, or perhaps even longer.

But, as for his answer... ]

... I don't think it was untrue, at least.

[ It's a good start, at least. Ninigi and Sakuya-hime, and the two of them... regardless of secrets and accusations, that love is real. There's no mistaking it. ]

Still, it's undeniable he broke her trust. Do you think you could forgive something so severe?

[ Maybe this isn't just a rhetorical question. ]

[ ... ah. That wasn't actually the break of trust Akechi had in mind, but this doesn't make him feel any better about it.

He casts his eyes downwards, and his hand leaves Akira's hair unattended for a minute. Even now after they've just exchanged such meaningful vows, it's hard for him to take a step that will leave him vulnerable, and terribly close to the truth he's been hiding all this time, but-- ]

What if you hadn't done anything to prompt it, though? What if you were completely innocent?

[ A lot more than Akechi will ever be. ]

If they had their reasons...

[ He trails off into silence again, dancing around the mental steps to a definite decision. He wants to be more honest-- at least with Akira, at least about this much-- but as much as he can rationalize and conclude Akira is far too kind for his own sake and might very well forgive him, he can't help but feel... scared.

He looks down again, searches for any traces of understanding in Akira's eyes, and courage, within himself. ]

Even if you did not agree with those reasons?

[ Akechi does feel him tense up against his lap, even if only minimally, and while his first impulse is to sink his fingers in that frizzy hair and offer him some comfort, he finds his own limbs frozen on the spot. As though afraid Akira would reject him.

Afraid he doesn't even deserve Akira, to begin with. ]

What if their perspective was one that could have ruined your life?

[ Or maybe, one that could have ended it. ]

[ Akechi's initial reaction is involuntary, a reflex to dodge Akira's searching glance. As much as they have grown closer, as much as Akechi trusts him and the comforting warmth of those hands, his line of thinking is... dangerous. A point of no return.

It's terrifying. ]

Ah, my apologies. I didn't mean to subject you to so many hypotheticals...

[ And there he is, slipping right back into his practiced manners and distance, though he does catch himself before it's too late-- before his oldest friend catches up to and greets him with an unrelenting embrace. Loneliness leaves no room for bonds.

He doesn't want to go back, though. He doesn't want to lose everything he's built with Akira. But... could their relationship really withstand this kind of test...? ]

I just...

[ He closes his eyes, tightens his grip on Akira's fingers. ]

I can't help but think of how hard it would have been for you, if you had truly been put through an interrogation.

[ For more than alleged assault charges, he means. ]

[ If only he could be that honest, then Akechi would feel even more unsure about what he's trying to do here-- he might, perhaps, even end the relationship on the spot, knowing that Akira had already seen his true colors. ]

If you had been captured... yes.

[ Fortunately, Akira doesn't go that far, so Akechi can still try add his own spin to it. His own truth. After all, from his point in time, he hasn't betrayed the Thieves, and the possibility is now just a long forgotten hypothetical that he's genuinely decided not to follow through with. A future that never was.

One that never will be, if he has any say in it. ]

Or perhaps... if someone had turned you in.

[ Still, that doesn't make his task any easier. ]

[ The ordeal isn't much different for Akechi; his own stomach is churning, a knife drawing chills in zigzag lines inside. ]

That is... such a strong word.

[ Betraying Akira, breaking his trust... Even though it has never left the realm of intentions, the very idea that he would turn him in, and later end his life in cold blood... As much as it was forever ago, as much as he's sworn to himself that he will protect Akira at all costs now... Could they really move past it?

He needs to try. ]

But, it is accurate, all the same.

[ He needs to press forward, push through his fears. It's the only way they can be truly real. ]

Striking a convenient deal only to later hand you over to the authorities, never making good on the word that was given... That would surely be an act of betrayal, wouldn't it...

[ That name, Akechi's own name... Even that small step had taken them so long to take, and hearing it now only makes him more scared of what he might lose. Is this the last time Akira will ever call him Goro...?

Deep down, he knows he should trust the feelings they have for each other, should trust Akira and the kindness of that (stupid, stupid) heart of his, but what if it's not enough? What if he read too much into near confessions over a talk of gloves, where neither said the words they should have-- not how they should have. What if their unquestionable truth is no more but misaligned feelings?

What if Akira only loves a fake...?

When Akechi finally looks up, there's clear hesitation in his eyes, as he searches Akira's for any signs his voice wasn't giving away-- whether judgement or fear, or even understanding, anything to give him solid direction. ]

... I would never break that deal. Not now, after all we have been through.

[ That's where he decides to start, to make his current intentions clear right off the bat. Hopefully Akira can trust him about that much, considering the suspicions he's about to confirm.

The next part if harder to say, though, so he takes a deep breath, averts his look yet again. ]

But, at that time... That was something I had in mind.

[ It doesn't reassure him, though, not really. But he knows there's no running away now. ]

Not all of you.

[ Though he can't bring himself to say it, the implication should be clear. There was never any need to turn in the entire group; he just needed one person to set the example.

What better choice than their leader, right? ]

I never really agreed with your methods. [ He pushes onwards, still unable to look Akira in the eye. ] Even now, I still don't-- and you should know that much, as I've never made a secret out of it. But, it is not as though I had a particular grudge against the Phantom Thieves, or even planning to do it as a means to win a case. It was just...

[ And here he is, down to the most critical part of his confession. He can't-- or rather, he could make up yet another lie to explain his reasoning, but he doesn't want to. He wants to be more honest. ]

... it was something I felt that had to be done, for the sake of my justice.

[ Yet, this is all the truth he can (safely) reveal for now. ]

[ Not mad, huh? This would have been so much easier, if he was. So much easier if he lashed out and left and acted more like a regular, less than stellar human being.

As it is, though... he feels like they're not standing on equal footing. Like he's not worthy of continuing. ]

It wasn't like that. [ A shake of his head, and another moment until he can collect his thoughts, cherry-pick his words so he's not downright lying. ]

However, turning you in would send a clear message: that no criminal can escape without punishment. Not even one whose methods are as elusive as that of the Phantom Thieves.

[ And that, of course, includes Shido himself, whose entire rise to power had been reliant on Akechi's services. ]