[ so, chroma is now being invaded by a shambling undead horde who...honestly don't seem that dangerous? like, maybe if you fell asleep outside and stayed still long enough for them to slowly hack at you they could be fatal, but since a small child can outrun the damn things dave isn't particularly worried about them. it's not like there's disneyland level crowds of skeletons or anything.
[ and then she swings the skeleton arm club at the skeleton's buddy, who is also a skeleton. it hits the ribs and throws it to the grown, the chest bones bursting and unable to hold up the rest of the body. ]
I'm a little let down - is that strange? These monsters are more a nuisance than a threat.
[ honestly, the skeletons aren't that intimidating. there isn't an untold multitude of them, they're slow as fuck, and their weapons are shit. the biggest concern, dave thinks, is maybe getting tetanus? what do they do if someone gets tetanus??? can one of the healers heal that? how the fuck does magical healing even WORK? ]
I guess we should like, try to avoid lettin' John Bone Jovi over there stab us with rust, because that's bad or something and tetanus. I forget what tetanus actually fucking does to you, but I assume it's bad because there's shots and things?
[ so pumpkin carving is a thing, and izuku is a yellow, but dave genuinely didn't even think about that when this started to be a thing. what probably happened is izuku just kind of stumbled on damian and dave carving dicks into pumpkins. so many pumpkins.
it's a freeze-frame shot. they've been caught red-handed, without ever delivering the goods to guren's door step.
there's only one thing to do. ]
So, hey, come help us play a trick on Guren. It's for some good old fashioned fun?
[Poor Izuku. Two Awful(tm) teenage boys have circled him like vultures, ready to taint him. Yes. Sit between them, the perfectly innocent, fun-loving boys.
Damian exchanges a glance with Dave around Izuku's head before looking back at Izuku again.] Of course.
We wouldn't waste our time with such asinine activities [would they though] unless it was for a good reason.
[Look at their, uh... glorious dick pumpkins? Gutted, carved, every rounded side covered in the expertly crafted holes of a phallus. The most unfortunate part is Damian is both a good artist and a good knife wielder. Yikes.]
[ dave exchanges the glance and. yep. BETTER TO NOT TELL IZUKU IT'S JUST TO FUCK WITH GUREN and also cheer up damian.
it's totally a quest. they totally meant to do the quest. hopefully izuku will never question the fact damian is blue and dave is red and the quest requires a yellow and they only called him over when he caught them...
don't think too hard, izuku!
dave is a less skilled artist than damian, and his style is more abstract, but he's clearly had a lot of practice drawing abstract graffiti dicks.
because...
he's dave...
that's it... ]
It's the Halloween spirit. Can't be the holiday without a few tricks, and the quest is two birds one stone, you know?
[Though Izuku still has a few questions--okay, a lot of questions--Damian's no-nonsense attitude seems to convince him of their innocence. (Why did he put his trust in them..)]
You have a point! The quest does ask for tricks, too. [As far as pranks go, this is pretty harmless, too.] Um, how many are you planning to make? [He's eyeing the many, many pumpkins the two have gathered around them.] I'm gonna guess you don't want sensei to know this was you, either.
[ what trick dave would pull is questionable, but when minato opens the door to dave's rhythmic knocking (it sounds like he's playing taps...) dave will hold out an empty pillowcase. he's wearing his dumb knight hood as a "costume", and says in the most deadpan voice possible: ]
[ obviously minato knows the way to dave's heart (too bad john got there first) and he looks absolutely? delighted? you know, for dave. he takes the bunnies and gingerly holds them and just looks. all around happy. ]
This is the best treat anyone has given me so far, holy shit. I hope you get the biggest reward.
[ "something" is vague. something could be anything, dave thinks. his shades (never), his eye color (no), a feeling (so many things he can't let go of). something precious, something that will be gone forever.
there's never any telling if it's worth it, with a quest.
but sometimes you have to take a leap of faith. this particular leap can't be taken alone, though, so dave just kind of shows up at okuyasu's place in the morning and immediately asks: ]
[Dave continues to prove he's the best bro in history by being totally on the same wavelength as Okuyasu, yet again. He's still not sure how long he wants to play along with the quests - and this one in particular is probably a really bad idea, but, well.
Why not, right? There's no denying that being in this place for months and months has shifted his perspectives a little, so...
So, here's Dave!!] Oh, hey. Maybe, I dunno. Trying to pick something's tough.
I'm thinking - maybe a memory? [ he shifts out of the way of the door, so that he and okuyasu can begin the walk. ] I'm not...sure, if that's fair game. But. I'll tell you about it, and then...
[ give it away.
the only items that are dear to him are his shades and the locket tied to john, that will revive him once.
I guess so. Not like Mr. F's real big on specifics, y'know?
[Soon he'll just start shouting into the open air to talk to the mysterious Mr. F, but for now, he just kind of says it like an unseen guy is watching them Truman Show style, somewhere.
Anyway. They're going to the well, he figures? So he'll come out of his house.]
[ so. dave sort of thinks nico is Cool? by dave strider standards, anyway. they maybe have more in common than he knows (sort-of-godly, dating a dude, have a sister they Adore more than life itself who isn't around just now) but the part he likes is the sort of morbid slant. it's nice to have someone around who operates on the same level humor-wise at times.
it's a slot rose lalonde usually filled for him, but his twin is sadly unavailable just now.
and because dave is dave, he gravitates to people that remind him of those who aren't around. and also. the morbid jokes. so he bothers to look nico up, giving him a nod before starting off with: ]
So, hey, are any of the quests interestin' to you? Minus the pumpkins, since I don't qualify.
[ Being Cool in someone's eyes is pretty big for Nico because some are just freaked out by him, others see him like family or don't think he's anything that special. Most his friends are demigods in their own rights and he just got the weird death powers. Thanks dad.
But Dave's an alright guy in Nico's books. Who else is willing to stick a skull inside of a pumpkin and call it decoration?
So when the guy suggests doing a quest, well Nico's up for that. Plus it's a good idea to get to know the people he's planning to take into the forest and summon ghosts with. The only person he hasn't met yet is John. ]
I've carved more pumpkins in the last couple of weeks than I have my whole life so that's fine. [ Okay, it was like five but when a kid can't remember most of his childhood it counts. ] And I now have a collection of bone scythes that would easily qualify me to become the next Death.
[ Let's not talk about the costumes... ] We can head to the well and you can watch me sacrifice something?
Absolutely. [ dave agrees without hesitation, because. well. that one is the most serious quest, and he himself... ] Maybe I'll toss somethin' in, too. Feeding the well is very nearly a community hobby.
[ not usually on purpose. although they should have expected that when they had a slumber party in the well recently. that was dumb. ]
I also have a surplus of scythes. Do they, like, want us to do whatever you do to plants with scythes, do you think?
[ Had the skeletons been more of a threat, it would have been ranked higher but Nico's found that it's right there alongside the dangers of pumpkin carving. ] Try not to toss me in if you can't think of anything else. I'm attempting to cut down on being eaten by pits of darkness.
[ Is he serious or is that just a joke? Hard to tell without explaining how he ended up in Tartarus. Why would anyone have a slumber party in the well? ]
Scythes are made for harvesting plants. [ Thanks for that tidbit of info Demeter. ] But I'm pretty sure if you tried to harvest the plants with a scythe made from bone that someone might get angry with you. Maybe we're just supposed to use them to decorate. Wouldn't be the first time I've seen furniture or entire rooms made out of human remains.
ZELDA: HOW ABOUT THEM BONES
still, a quest has been given and dave doesn't mind answering the call.
unfortunately for zelda, she chose to answer the call with dave. ]
Hey, Zelda. Why are skeletons so calm? [ it's not a philosophic question - ] Nothin' ever gets under their skin.
[ GET IT
sorry for him zelda ]
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[ says zelda, wielding the arm of a skeleton she smacked down earlier as her weapon of choice. ]
We don't know what to expect from this. ...Unlike the skeletons, who can feel it in their bones.
[ ok maybe it isn't so serious. ]
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Too bad we don't have any spare ribs around for them to order.
[ GET IT!!!!!!!!!!
he's just using his sword against the skeletons. it's super effective.
as would be a frying pan or like anything, he thinks. they're sort of fragile. ]
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[ and then she swings the skeleton arm club at the skeleton's buddy, who is also a skeleton. it hits the ribs and throws it to the grown, the chest bones bursting and unable to hold up the rest of the body. ]
I'm a little let down - is that strange? These monsters are more a nuisance than a threat.
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[ dave kind of glances at their rusted weaponry. ]
I can, uh, reverse their timelines so they're, like. Not all rusted.
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KEITH: MONTHLY MONSTER DATE
I guess we should like, try to avoid lettin' John Bone Jovi over there stab us with rust, because that's bad or something and tetanus. I forget what tetanus actually fucking does to you, but I assume it's bad because there's shots and things?
DAMIAN & IZUKU: MISCHIEF
it's a freeze-frame shot. they've been caught red-handed, without ever delivering the goods to guren's door step.
there's only one thing to do. ]
So, hey, come help us play a trick on Guren. It's for some good old fashioned fun?
[ RECRUIT IZUKU BEFORE HE SQUEALS. ]
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And then, surprisingly, he sits down beside them, somewhat gingerly.]
Is this for the quest?
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Damian exchanges a glance with Dave around Izuku's head before looking back at Izuku again.] Of course.
We wouldn't waste our time with such asinine activities [would they though] unless it was for a good reason.
[Look at their, uh... glorious dick pumpkins? Gutted, carved, every rounded side covered in the expertly crafted holes of a phallus. The most unfortunate part is Damian is both a good artist and a good knife wielder. Yikes.]
We're going to put them in front of his house.
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it's totally a quest. they totally meant to do the quest. hopefully izuku will never question the fact damian is blue and dave is red and the quest requires a yellow and they only called him over when he caught them...
don't think too hard, izuku!
dave is a less skilled artist than damian, and his style is more abstract, but he's clearly had a lot of practice drawing abstract graffiti dicks.
because...
he's dave...
that's it... ]
It's the Halloween spirit. Can't be the holiday without a few tricks, and the quest is two birds one stone, you know?
I somehow lost this notif??
You have a point! The quest does ask for tricks, too. [As far as pranks go, this is pretty harmless, too.] Um, how many are you planning to make? [He's eyeing the many, many pumpkins the two have gathered around them.] I'm gonna guess you don't want sensei to know this was you, either.
smh kami
izuku needs more costumes
does he...
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MINATO: TRICK OR TREAT
Trick or treat?
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One sec.
[HE'S GOING TO GET FETCH YOU A TREAT, DAVE.]
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dave will wait patiently, trusting minato to have a treat and not require him to do a trick.
which was like, probably gonna be to pants minato or something. ]
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It's these. Enjoy your bunny apples, Dave, because Minato's offering them with a straight face.]
Treat.
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This is the best treat anyone has given me so far, holy shit. I hope you get the biggest reward.
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OKUYASU: NOT SO SMALL SACRIFICES
there's never any telling if it's worth it, with a quest.
but sometimes you have to take a leap of faith. this particular leap can't be taken alone, though, so dave just kind of shows up at okuyasu's place in the morning and immediately asks: ]
You plannin' to sacrifice anything, man?
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Why not, right? There's no denying that being in this place for months and months has shifted his perspectives a little, so...
So, here's Dave!!] Oh, hey. Maybe, I dunno. Trying to pick something's tough.
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[ give it away.
the only items that are dear to him are his shades and the locket tied to john, that will revive him once.
he isn't willing to give either of those up. ]
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[Soon he'll just start shouting into the open air to talk to the mysterious Mr. F, but for now, he just kind of says it like an unseen guy is watching them Truman Show style, somewhere.
Anyway. They're going to the well, he figures? So he'll come out of his house.]
Tell me whatever you want, dude.
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[ it's a quiet offering, and dave isn't certain he's strong enough to sacrifice little pieces of a brother he actually cares about, but - ]
When those little portal things popped up, we went to my room together.
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NICO: WHAT WE GIVE AWAY
it's a slot rose lalonde usually filled for him, but his twin is sadly unavailable just now.
and because dave is dave, he gravitates to people that remind him of those who aren't around. and also. the morbid jokes. so he bothers to look nico up, giving him a nod before starting off with: ]
So, hey, are any of the quests interestin' to you? Minus the pumpkins, since I don't qualify.
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But Dave's an alright guy in Nico's books. Who else is willing to stick a skull inside of a pumpkin and call it decoration?
So when the guy suggests doing a quest, well Nico's up for that. Plus it's a good idea to get to know the people he's planning to take into the forest and summon ghosts with. The only person he hasn't met yet is John. ]
I've carved more pumpkins in the last couple of weeks than I have my whole life so that's fine. [ Okay, it was like five but when a kid can't remember most of his childhood it counts. ] And I now have a collection of bone scythes that would easily qualify me to become the next Death.
[ Let's not talk about the costumes... ] We can head to the well and you can watch me sacrifice something?
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[ not usually on purpose. although they should have expected that when they had a slumber party in the well recently. that was dumb. ]
I also have a surplus of scythes. Do they, like, want us to do whatever you do to plants with scythes, do you think?
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[ Is he serious or is that just a joke? Hard to tell without explaining how he ended up in Tartarus. Why would anyone have a slumber party in the well? ]
Scythes are made for harvesting plants. [ Thanks for that tidbit of info Demeter. ] But I'm pretty sure if you tried to harvest the plants with a scythe made from bone that someone might get angry with you. Maybe we're just supposed to use them to decorate. Wouldn't be the first time I've seen furniture or entire rooms made out of human remains.
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